The Only Rule is; There Are No Rules

Her Ladyship is often asked for the short and sweet rules of what to wear. Unfortunately her Ladyship is neither. When it comes to the so-called rules of formal attire, her Ladyship has confronted many opinions that state that any possible variation in sleeve length, lapel style, jacket style, etc. is perfectly acceptable. Of course, that’s the way our world is, everyone has a different opinion and the burning need to express it. So how do you decide who’s right, who’s got an agenda and who’s a pompous windbag?

Just goggling any issue on formal attire will bring up site after site giving you what the author seem to consider is the definitive rule but rarely is there concordance among them. One insidious trend seems to be some sort of postmodern sense of politically correct permissiveness. All manner of attire are encouraged as options for expressing one’s individuality. Curious is the fact that these authorities, who claim to be freeing us from the shackles of the past, all seem to think that if it’s black, it’s formal. If a black duster or Nehru jacket is permissible for a black tie event, why not red or puce? If you can ignore tradition in style why not ignore the tradition of black? This is what her Ladyship hopes her readers will understand, that there must be consistency in the reasoning used to arrive at a decision of what degree of variation or expression of individuality is best for a particular event.

Time and time again her Ladyship must point out that traditional is safest because a true gentleman does not call attention to himself. This standard evolved in the Victorian era and still applies. Think of this as the visual equivalent of the loud obnoxious party guest. If you show respect for your host and those around you by retaining a conservative, traditional look others will always see you as elegant. If you wear a garish cummerbund and tie set then your personality may be assumed to be garish as well. The phrase “timeless elegance” is what one should aim for and doesn’t this phrase imply retaining traditional values in dress and manner?

There is room for individuality and personal expression but it’s a matter of degrees and balance. Dictionary.com defines formality as the “condition or quality of being formal; accordance with required or traditional rules, procedures, etc.; conventionality”. If an event is one attended by traditional ceremony, that is, a set of behaviors and actions handed down through the ages, then so should attire be more traditional. The solemnity of an occasion is also a consideration. A solemn religious or state ceremony would imply greater formality. One wouldn’t wear a festive, brightly colored vest to a state funeral. The pomp and pageantry of the event should also be considered. The opening of Ascot comes to mind. One would not normally expect to wear a formal morning coat to a horse race but high pageantry is the norm at this event.

First and foremost you should follow the wishes of your host as stated in the invitation. It is only within these bounds that you can vary your attire but, the degree to which an event is governed by formal or traditional rules or standards, even expected behaviors and actions, is the degree to which one’s dress should adhere to tradition. For example, if one were to be invited to the awards ceremony for the Nobel Prize or the Medal of Freedom then one should wear white tie or a very conservative, peaked lapel tuxedo. (Shockingly, her Ladyship has never been invited to either so we don’t know if the invitation requests white tie specifically). If one is invited to a formal society wedding and the invitation states “black tie”, then one may get away with a notched lapel but peaked is probably a better bet. If one is invited to an event for which the invitation reads “fun formal”, as her Ladyship has seen recently, then those novelty shirt studs and cufflinks or powder blue tuxedo may have a reason to be seen in public.

If you know the crowd in attendance at an event and their sense of formality (some would say stuffiness) then the decisions about how far one goes in expressing their individuality are easy. If one is new to the social circle that will be attending an event then conservative and traditional will always be safe. At best, attempting to be noticed by dressing in attire that expresses your identity in a non-traditional way runs the risk of misinterpretation by a group of people that will be making a first impression of you. At worst one could brand one’s self a buffoon.

The simple fact that some web site or sales person or the office fashion plate has stated that something is acceptable doesn’t mean it’s always acceptable in all instances. There are no rules in formal attire or in dress in general, only traditions and customs. So, if some pompous windbag (her Ladyship knows what you’re thinking) starts quoting “rules” don’t listen. Educate yourself about what is traditional and how formal attire has evolved and make informed decisions. Her Ladyship makes every effort to avoid giving rules and rather attempts to educate her readers so that they can make decisions that display a classic elegance, an impression of ease with their choices and wear their attire with confidence.

It is her Ladyship’s opinion that this habit of quoting rules is why there is so much confusion about what to wear. There are so many conflicting opinions and indeed her ladyship’s advice may seem contradictory at times but this is because each situation demands different actions. It is only by learning how and why different styles evolve that one can make decisions that meet with the widest approval. Of course this learning takes time. One can look for short cuts but one should be mindful that there are pitfalls along this path. Then too, there are always the rebels that have philosophical (or is it psychological) issues with social customs who must follow guidelines her Ladyship cannot expound upon in this discussion. Formal attire is what we’re discussing and, coming full circle, formal by definition is an “…accordance with required or traditional rules, procedures, etc.; conventionality”.

Back to Basics

A little review of the basics never hurts and the question her Ladyship most often gets is about the different lapel styles. So, today we look at the lapel styles for tuxedo jackets.

This is for educational purposes only for the chorus because it has been decided that you all should have a notched lapel. Not her Ladyship’s choice but it is what is most widely available and what the majority already has. If you have some other lapel style look for a notched lapel when the time comes to replace your jacket.

The traditional and most elegant lapel style and, in her Ladyship's opinion, the most correct is the peak or peaked lapel.

The tuxedo evolved as a more casual answer to the tailcoat but at it’s origin retained the peaked lapel which is the only style lapel one should ever see on a tailcoat. Peaked lapels are also traditional on double-breasted jackets.

Peaked lapels, as shown here, have a sharp point extending above the collar. The part that goes around your neck is the collar; the part that is an extension of the front of the jacket that is below the collar is the lapel. The lapel laps back over the body of the jacket.

Notched lapels are what you are most accustomed to seeing. This is what you will see on almost every business suit and all manner of jacket. Rather than pointing up above the collar the notched lapel is cut off in a straight line from where it is sewn to the end of the collar.

The appearance of the notched lapel in formal wear was conceived by manufacturers as a cost saving measure. By retaining the same form as the business suits that are in highest demand and simply facing the lapels in satin they were able to produce both business and formal wear without retraining or retooling or even developing new patterns. The notched lapel is also somewhat easier to sew.

Although the notched lapel tuxedo is by far the most common it is also just that: common. It is a corruption of the traditional done as a cost saving measure. To her Ladyship, that says cheap. In so many instance people are willing to pay a premium for quality and feel that by doing so their image is enhanced. Why buy a Mercedes when a Kia will get you from point A to point B as well? If you can explain why so many men would choose the Mercedes then please explain to her Ladyship why so many men will choose the notched lapel.

Shawl collars. What to say? If you think a formal bathrobe is elegant then this is for you. The shawl collar is a collar, not a lapel because, although it is an extension of the front body of the jacket, it extends in one continuous piece around the neck.

This style collar is derived from the smoking jacket; a sort of formal robe that men wore in the 19th Century when they retired with other gentlemen for an after dinner cigar. Gentlemen wore smoking jackets to prevent the smell of cigar smoke from impregnating their formal tailcoats. It was lounge wear not meant to be seen in public, it was worn at home.

Early in the 20^th century the dinner jacket appeared and was worn at small private dinners at home or in the country. At that time it was considered very casual and one would not have dreamt of wearing it in public. In warm climates the dinner jacket was often seen in white. The dinner jacket has traditionally had a shawl collar owing to its origins in the lounging jacket (a.k.a. robe). As society has become more and more casual and it has become acceptable to dine at home attired only in one's ratty old boxers, the shawl collared dinner jacket naturally began to look very formal. Gradually wires got crossed, the world turned upside down and suddenly, men were wearing dinner jackets and lounge wear to formal public events. Her Ladyship is quite at a loss as to what to say other than one should reserve the shawl collar tuxedo for when one is invited to a dinner (not one that has an associated ceremony like a wedding or awards presentation) in which the invitation requests “black tie”. In today’s society such an event is rare and so should the shawl collared tuxedo jacket be concomitantly rare.

The shawl collar is also unflattering to the full figure. The curving line of the collar accentuates roundness; if the figure is likewise round it merely highlights and draws attention to this shape. Few men would benefit from such an unflattering comparison.

Lovingly,

Lady Prisspott

Double Trouble

Let's talk about the double-breasted tuxedo if we may. It's is no mean feat to pull this look off. To illustrate just how difficult this look can be here are two examples from a single runway show by Signor Valentino.

Both are on gorgeous, thin models yet the model on the left looks less trim and a little frumpy; even a little stuffy and uncomfortable. The reason Monsieur Valentino has made this work in the jacket on the right is the closely-fitted, tapered waist line, the more acute angle of the lapels and the overall proportionality, as well as the fact that it looks more relaxed (which is not to say casual or sloppy). The tux on the left is less flattering to an otherwise adorable model. The lapels look too wide for their short length and the wider angle contributes to the illusion that the model is thick-waisted.

Which brings up my primary admonition. Too many of you have been deluded into believing the oft-repeated lie that large men look good in a double-breasted suit. They don’t! A large man in a double-breasted suit only looks like the back of an upholstered sofa or worse, like Winston Churchill.


Many people also feel that the double-breasted tuxedo is quite elegant. Indeed, it was made popular by many fashionable men of 20th Century. This notion however ignores its origin. It was modeled after the 1914 Navy pea coat which is outerwear, meant for and designed as, a utilitarian garment; hardly the sort of pedigree one should look for in elegant attire.

One can rail against tradition all one wishes but in men’s attire, particularly formal attire, traditional is always going to be found most acceptable and men are no longer permitted the luxury of being the strutting peacocks of the 17th and 18th Centuries. Men have been condemned to uniformity by the Victorian standard of etiquette that demands that a gentleman does not call attention to himself in either manner or dress.

Of course for my dears of GMCW there should be no double breasted jackets because you are wearing a uniform and, quelle surprise, you should be uniform. If that's not clear her Ladyship shall say it again. No double breasted tuxedos!

Looking out for your look,
Lady Prisspott

The Care and Feeding of a Cravat

A troubled tenor writes her Ladyship with the following problem:

"I have kept my silver tie folded on the shelf in my closet. I pulled it out while redecorating my bedroom, and it appears to be quite creased. I'm concerned because I did the hang the tie in the bathroom thing with my red tie for the Christmas concert for over a week, and it still had the fold in the center. Is there a way to carefully iron these ties? Should I take it to the cleaners and have them do it? I don't want to look a mess on stage and let you down. HELP!"

(For my dear readers outside the chorus I must explain that silver "long" ties were generously donated to the chorus for their silver anniversary.)

Our trembling tenor has been dealt with. Bartleby (her Ladyship's faithful manservant) has been dispatched to flog said tenor for his transgressions. You see, when these ties were purchased her Ladyship composed an informative e-mail elucidating the proper care of one's tie. This applies to all fine silk ties but is even more critical when dealing with inexpensive polyester ties. (The dictates of economic necessity were such that polyester was the only sensible option for the chorus.) Her Ladyship's dear boys were instructed to roll their ties for storage as this is the only way to avoid wrinkles.

One should never, never fold their tie for storage the reason being, folding a tie will cause a crease and you should never iron or press a tie...ever. Her Ladyship doesn't even recommend hanging the tie on a tie rack unless one is sure that the ties won't get crushed in the closet as one shoves one's garments to the side looking for that shirt that is just the right shade of cerulean blue that makes one's eyes dance. Pressing or ironing ruins the soft roll of the edge of the tie and creates an unsightly crisp crease at the side. Even a professional pressing by a dry cleaner will cause this...a reputable dry cleaner would refuse to press one's tie.

If one has tried steaming one's tie, as our terrorized tenor has done, and it failed, then there are only 3 options left. In this instance purchasing a new tie makes the most sense as they cost less than professional refurbishment in the first place...unless, of course, one cannot purchase it from the same vendor (wouldn't want a dove gray tie in a sea of silver gray). Next on the list would be to send the tie off to an establishment such as Tiecrafters in New York http://tiecrafters.com/cleaning.html who, for much less than the price of a new, fine silk cravat, will meticulously refurbish ones ruined tie. The last and most desperate measure is to place the tie face up on an ironing board, cover it with a lightweight clean cloth and using a good, powerful steam iron that is known not to spit droplets of water, steam the tie WITHOUT touching the iron to the tie or cloth. If this still doesn't release the crease turn it over and try LIGHTLY pressing and steaming the tie from the back. This will no doubt leave a vertical crease on the front of the tie but this is less noticeable on stage than a horizontal crease. If all these measures fail you could try wearing it as a belt; Fred Astair got away with it, maybe you can too...(eyes rolling).

IF one has successfully removed the crease what then does one do with the tie? That's right, class! Roll it and store it. One should roll it and then one could, say; place it in a clean empty rolled oats container to protect it or use one of many commercially available storage boxes.


Her Ladyship particularly likes the plastic tube containers for transporting the tie to concerts rather than tossing it, along with its fate, willy-nilly into the bottom of the garment bag.

One final tip; to extend the life of any tie it should be untied by reversing the steps used to tie it rather than pulling the short end through the knot. Regardless of how temptingly convenient it is to yank it through the knot, this will stress the fabric and the lining and distort the tie.

With Sartorial Sanctimony,
Lady Prisspott

Fashion Week Formality

My dearest Darlings,

There has been quite a dearth of formal attire at Fashion Week but we can always rely on the great Armani to show them all how it's done. It is tragic that dear, sweet Georgie chose to show this lovely tuxedo under a coat more suited to mushing a sled laden with the pelts of defenseless baby animals across the frozen Canadian wilderness than for wearing to a formal event but, forgiving this one faux-pas, we see a well proportioned suit with trousers of proper length and an appropriate turn-down collar with the bow tie. As her Ladyship has preached and preached; one should reserve the wing collar for white tie. The wing collar is too formal for the more casual tuxedo which is, after all, styled after the smoking jacket.
Boys, the eighties are over! Throw out those wing collars unless you plan to wear this:




Here again we can see a jacket with the proper sleeve length. Note that the sleeves of the shirt extend below the jacket sleeve. This is how it's done. Her Ladyship is at quite a loss to understand how so many gentlemen have chosen to wear their jacket sleeves at a length where their shirtsleeve should end and their shirtsleeve at a length where their jacket sleeve should end. It makes one look as though they borrowed their big brother's suit.





It goes without saying that there were the usual misguided attempts to redefine formal attire but, men’s attire and particularly formal attire, seems hidebound by tradition and, in fact, the decorum of many formal events allows no room for calling attention to ones self by sporting outlandish fads such as Mr. Galliano proposes:Darling I absolutely love what you do with your women’s lines and you are a true genius but when it comes to men's wear...well, what is this, chic attire for a formal 7-11 hold up?

And, of course we have the usual attempts at fad making by the marketers that think they are designers such as Mr. Tommy Hackfiger. Here we have the gay Dr. No look.

Just say no!

Finally, Vuitton show us the latest in formal vampire chic. I include this for your edification because if you disregard the oh-so-fey shoulder bag it comes just shy of the mark. The grograin ribbon trim on the lapel is passable but, note the indentation below the shoulder pads. This occurs when the jacket shoulders are broader than your own. Perhaps the model that was intended to wear this fainted backstage but it’s just a wee bit too big for Red. Sleeve length is good but the pants appear to be a tad too long and then there are the clodhoppers with which he appears to be shod. These belong in the barn not at a ball. Patent leather evening pumps, my boys. It takes a true man to wear evening pumps. These say that you're too insecure about your sexuality to pull off patent leather.

As Ever,
Lady Prisspott

Cheerio chappies,

There is a stereotype of the English gentleman as one who is possessed of an effortless elegance and style, but we all know that stereotypes are often proven wrong. Witness the ungirdled proof:

Our ordinarily dapper dandy Hugh Grant may have intended to look devil-may-care. Sadly for him he hit the target somewhere around dumpy. This is a visual reminder of why we wear a cummerbund with a tuxedo. Our Mr. Grant would have benefited greatly from a belly concealing swath of black, if not a complete ab workout. As for Miss Barrymore, not even a fabulous haute couture gown from the collection of our dear Monsieur Galliano (long live the King) could help her sagging bosom. There's room for her to tuck her evening bag into the front of that dress with her deflated dirty pillows. And darling, get your foot off the hem, you look like white trash at her first prom...well they both do. Mr. Grant's pants are far too long. What is that a quadruple break? These look more like baggy sweat pants than formal trousers. A gentleman's trouser should hang in a smooth straight line with only a slight break thusly:

Although these cavalry twill pants by Brook's Brothers are not evening-wear they are shown in the proper length for a man's trouser.

Let's contrast Dumpy and Frumpy with a dashing Dr. McDreamy:

Dear Mr. Dempsey is not even wearing a tuxedo but looks far more elegant in a perfectly fitting jacket, French cuffs extending below the jacket sleeve, an elegant sliver of a pocket square peeping from his breast pocket and of course that shayne punim which doesn't hurt his overall look...

Keeping you formally fashion forward,

LP